When I look back I can understand why my mum and dad were
worried about me wanting to get married. There was a six-year age gap between
Bob and I, and I had never had any other serious relationships. I still had to
be home by 9pm (unless there was a dance) and Bob always made sure I was. We
wanted to get married when I was seventeen, but mum and dad would not hear of
it. We got engaged anyway on a day trip to Windsor, and we went to Aldershot
where he bought me a lovely Sapphire ring. That caused a real upset as my
friend, Violet, told my parents before I had a chance to talk to them. My dad
was furious and said I could not get married until I was nineteen, he did not
believe we would still be together then.
Bob in 1961
Bob’s family always made me welcome. We often visited Mike (Bob’s
brother) his wife Pat and their daughter Marian in Alton. Bob was Marian's Godfather,
and he thought an awful lot of her. They lived in a bungalow with all mod cons.
There was no bathroom in Bob’s parent’s house, and so he visited Pat and Mike
once a week to have a bath. After we got married, we had no bathroom either so
the regular trips to Alton went on.
We proved dad wrong and on the 3rd June 1961 Bob and I were
married at Long Sutton Church. Mum persuaded me to buy a second-hand dress for
the wedding, which I always regretted, but everyone said it looked nice, and it
did save money. It had a high neck and was embossed net over satin with a full
skirt. I managed to upset one of Bob’s Aunties by not asking her to make my
wedding dress. None of the family thought to tell me it was the tradition which
was a shame because I could have had a dress in the style I really wanted. She
was the only invited guest who failed to turn up at our wedding.
I was up bright and early on the morning of the wedding. Mrs. Matheson offered me flowers from the
garden at Well Manor to decorate the church. It was a perfect day with not a
cloud in the sky and my arms were soon full of roses, delphiniums, Ladies Mantle
and lots of greenery. I cycled to Long Sutton and arranged the flowers all around
the church which took much longer than expected. When I got home mum was in a
panic as I had only half an hour to get ready. My hair had been washed and set
in Odiham on the previous day so, pin in the kiss curl, a quick wash and into
my dress, face powder, lipstick, brush out pin curl, clip on veil and ready.
Left to Right - Jack Wood, Hartie Wood, Mike Wood, Marian, Bob, Sue, Barbara Flitney, Rene Flitney, Denis Flitney
My bouquet turned up just in time and the bridesmaids,
Barbara and Bob’s Goddaughter Marian, both wore pretty dresses and carried
baskets of flowers in pastel colours. I can’t remember, but I expect dad had to
go to Alton to pick Marian up. I know she, and my sister got on really well and
Barbara was very good and looked after Marian all day. (Actually Sue I think
Marian looked after me – she was much younger but also far more sensible!) Dad
and one of the uncles dressed their cars with white ribbon and off we all went
to the church. Mum wore a lovely blue/grey pleated dress, which really suited
her, so much so that she was buried in the same dress several years later. Mike
was Bob’s best man and managed to get him to the church on time. The rest of
the family from Alton hired a coach to get to the church, which was the easiest
solution as few people had cars in those days, and public transport was
hopeless.
As I walked into the church on dad’s arm the organist (not
the usual one) played “Fight the Good Fight” which as you might imagine caused
quite a laugh. The Rural Dean, the Rev Knapp who was the vicar at East Worldham
took the ceremony along with the Vicar of Long Sutton. We had the full choir
and the bell ringers. After the ceremony, photographs were taken outside the
church, it was still a lovely sunny day, and half the village turned out to
watch. Our reception was held in Long Sutton Village Hall. Friends and
neighbours helped prepare the food the evening before, and it was while setting
it all up that Bob caused a stir by turning up. “Its bad luck to see the bride
before the wedding” was the cry that went around the hall, but I wasn't worried
as I felt sure that only counted on the actual wedding day.
The reception was not like wedding receptions of today with all the expense they incur and we managed to do it all very cheaply. The glasses and drink came from the local pub on the understanding that anything unused could be returned for a refund. Bentley Stores delivered lots of cakes, and we made egg, ham (best ham!) and corned beef sandwiches. We put out tables, covered with mum’s pretty embroidered tablecloths, plates of sandwiches and cakes on each table and everyone had these with either an alcoholic drink or a cup of tea.
The wedding cake was a wedding present from mum and dad, but we paid for everything else ourselves. Unfortunately, the cake was so hard it proved impossible to cut, the best we could do was pose for photographs with the uncut cake. Later mum and dad managed to hack some slices out of it to pass around to the guests. My granddad got very drunk and decided to walk off with half the presents, but very quickly got stopped in his tracks and told to put them back. He could not understand that we might need ten tea towels! My Godmother, Rebecca West, was out of the country but she sent us a cheque for £50.00 – a lot of money in those days.
Left to Right - Hartie Wood (mother of the groom) , Rene Flitney (mother of the bride), Cousin John Flitney, Bob, Sue and Bob's Aunt Olive.
The little lad in front is Colin Smith (son of Aunt Jean & Uncle Graham)
The little lad in front is Colin Smith (son of Aunt Jean & Uncle Graham)
The reception was not like wedding receptions of today with all the expense they incur and we managed to do it all very cheaply. The glasses and drink came from the local pub on the understanding that anything unused could be returned for a refund. Bentley Stores delivered lots of cakes, and we made egg, ham (best ham!) and corned beef sandwiches. We put out tables, covered with mum’s pretty embroidered tablecloths, plates of sandwiches and cakes on each table and everyone had these with either an alcoholic drink or a cup of tea.
The wedding cake was a wedding present from mum and dad, but we paid for everything else ourselves. Unfortunately, the cake was so hard it proved impossible to cut, the best we could do was pose for photographs with the uncut cake. Later mum and dad managed to hack some slices out of it to pass around to the guests. My granddad got very drunk and decided to walk off with half the presents, but very quickly got stopped in his tracks and told to put them back. He could not understand that we might need ten tea towels! My Godmother, Rebecca West, was out of the country but she sent us a cheque for £50.00 – a lot of money in those days.
Visiting Wimble Hill Hospital, Uncle Bill (Bill Harding brother of Rene Harding nee Flitney) acting as chauffeur.
After the wedding we visited Wimble Hill hospital and I gave
the oldest patient my bouquet – beautiful yellow roses and Gypsophila. Our
friends Brian and Sue drove us down to Bracklesham Bay for our honeymoon, and
the reality of married life started to hit home. Bob’s mum enjoyed spoiling him,
and after he left the Fleet Air Arm she did all his ironing and generally
looked after him. It didn't go down too well when on the second day of our honeymoon,
I was required to iron a shirt using a flat iron (I had only ever used an
electric one) add to that the fact I wanted to go for a walk but Bob wanted to go
to the Club House to watch cricket. I decided to go for a walk on my own but
struck up a friendship with a lovely Red Setter and he and I spent many hours
walking together while Bob watched sport. Mind you as the years went by Bob
would certainly change and always wanted to celebrate Valentines Day and any
anniversary. Even when we were really hard up he would buy me a little trinket
or a plant for the garden….
Sue and friend
Memories of Susan Poulter nee Flitney; Sue is my older sister (although she looks younger!)
/To be continued
