Guest Post - My Sister Remembers - Part Nine

A guest post by my sister Sue Poulter. See previous post here

Part of the deal at Wyck was that I had to work on the farm. One of my first jobs was helping the other women cut strings to use for training the hops. It was winter time and very cold, so I always put a hot-water bottle in the pram with Jackie, but it was hard to keep her warm and impossible to keep myself warm. When the snow came I asked the farm manager if we could have some heating in the barn, but his answer was a resounding no. The snow was so bad I had to pull the pram through snowdrifts to get to the barn. All the other women seemed happy to put up with it, but I downed tools one particularly bad day and said, “No heat, no work” and walked out. The other women chased after me and said that Bob would lose his job, but I won the day, and we had a heater installed in the barn soon after. It didn't make much difference though and the snow lasted until after Easter.

Sue and Jackie at Wyck

Once Bob started working in the hop gardens all his clothes and the house smelt of hops which I hated.  Following harassment from the farm manager, who thought I was ungrateful and should remember I was living in a tied cottage, Bob decided it was time to look for another job.  Mum and dad felt sorry for us, and dad asked Bob if he would like to become his Herdsman at Well Manor Farm.  We thought this would be fine, but it doesn't pay to live next door to your parents and certainly not to work for your father-in-law. Dad was not the easiest of people to work with and didn't have much patience with Bob. The hours were long, and the pay was poor and Bob ended up getting part time gardening work on his one day off a week. The house we lived in was very cold, and we only had a fire with a back boiler for heating the water, and coal was so expensive we had to sell some of our belongings to pay for it.  I loved the garden though and grew all our own vegetables. I remember a visit from granny who seeing me digging up potatoes gave Bob a really hard time, but he was working all hours and was always exhausted.

Bob and Jackie in the garden at Well

Mum and dad seemed to be fairly comfortably off at this time so when the grocery van came from Bentley Stores mum would buy loads of vegetables, fruit and "best ham" whilst Bob and I could only afford perhaps a loaf of bread. Funny when a mother seems to take delight in having more than her children.  I remember on one occasion she bought a new rug for the kitchen and asked if I wanted the old one. I was really pleased as we didn't have one, but when she brought it round she asked me to pay for it. I paid up but could have done with the money to put towards the outstanding electricity and other bills.

The Well at Well

The village had not changed since I was a teenager. There was an old water well in the middle, which I assume gave the place its name, and one pub called The Chequers, there were no buses and because Bob didn't drink there was nothing to do in the village. Jackie was a very bright baby. She read simple words and remembered every song and nursery rhyme we taught her, and of course I had plenty of time to spend with her. The highlight of my year was to go next door to watch the Royal Variety Performance on mum and dad’s television. I would wash, change and put my make-up on, as though I was going somewhere special. I started driving lessons as Bob thought it would be good for me to get out and about. The lessons had to stop when I found I was pregnant again and there was no chance of any spare money. This time the doctor kept more of an eye on me because of the problems when I was pregnant with Jackie. We couldn't afford all the food he suggested, but we had plenty of fresh vegetables and salad in the garden, so I lived on that. Probably the reason I regained my figure so quickly after the new baby was born.

Mum in the garden with Michael

Michael was born in the February of 1964 and Mum Wood looked after Jackie while I was in the hospital. His was a more straightforward birth, and he was a lovely placid baby with a mop of black hair. Everyone said he looked like a member of The Beatles, who were all the rage at the time. I was in the hospital for ten days and really looking forward to getting home to Jackie but when I did she had forgotten me and bonded with Mum Wood.  It was really upsetting but it only took a few days for her to get used to me again. Thank goodness Michael was such a good baby as not long after he was born Jackie suddenly became ill. She was two years old that summer, and it was then that she started screaming at night while rocking backwards and forwards and hitting her head against the wall. It was very distressing and nothing we did helped. The doctor suggested giving her junior aspirin, which also didn't help but she seemed better after a week or two and so with much relief we put it down to a virus. 

We managed to scrape up enough money for me to start my driving lessons again, and luckily I passed the test at my first attempt. We didn't know it at the time, but this was to prove a Godsend. 

It was a short while later that Bob began to have health problems. During the war, when he was six or seven, he was run over by a tank at the top of Worldham Hill (probably playing “chicken”or some such game) and spent many months in hospitals undergoing plastic surgery to his arm. Now all these years later a growth appeared on his arm. The doctor decided the growth would have to be removed and although the operation was a success, it made us appreciate each other more and reminded us just how short life can be. Bob always wore long-sleeved shirts even in the summer months but after more plastic surgery, he was happy to have his arm on show.  Jackie had continued to be a concern and on one of the doctor's visits to Bob, I asked him to take a look at her.  She had put on a lot of weight, and her face was often flushed. I thought it might be indigestion, but the doctor felt it could be epilepsy. My dad said it would be best to forget about it as she would be fine when she got older. Not an easy thing to do when you are worried about so many things.

Michael

I found out I was pregnant again when Michael was eight months old. I must say I wasn't very pleased as I felt two children were enough. Bob, however, was over the moon saying he would get his football team yet! As I've said previously Michael was a lovely baby, very easy to feed and always happy to sleep. He was baptised at Long Sutton Church on a very warm day when I was already seven months pregnant. After the service, all the family and friends came back to our house for tea. It was a nice day, but I was quite pleased when everyone went home.  When I went into labour with James Matthew in July 1965, Jacqueline and Michael went to stay with their Auntie Pat and Uncle Mike in Alton, where they had a lovely time playing with their cousins. I think coming home to a crying baby must have been a bit of a shock for them. Although they had a lovely time in Alton it was a shame they could not stay at home with Grandma and Granddad Flitney living next door, but they made it quite clear that as I was having the children it was my responsibility to find someone to look after them as they were not going to!

Sue holding Michael and mum holding hands with Jackie

Not long after James was born Bob started getting attention from a very attractive young lady in the village. Her car always (conveniently for her) broke down outside our house when Bob was at home for lunch. He would leave his lunch and go out to check she and her car were all right. After a few months of this I went to see her and told her just what I would do if she didn't leave him alone.  I can be quite a scary person when angry, and she backed off. I felt almost sorry for Bob as I’m sure he was quite innocent as to what she was up to, but I was having none of it.  Soon after this he decided it was time for a move, especially as relations between him and dad were becoming very strained.

After a few interviews he secured a job at Taplins Farm, between Hartley Wintney and Winchfield. The farm has now gone the way of many others and is an Industrial Estate. But when we lived there it was a rural area with beautiful views. We had a detached house with a conservatory on the side, and a lovely playroom for the children. When we first moved in the children had some bad tummy upsets and Michael often had sore throats and had to have his tonsils removed. Jackie also became unwell again and began to have “vacant” spells. The doctor suggested we take her to see a paediatrician in Reading. Bob couldn't get time off for the appointment so I drove myself and Jackie there. The consultant was most unsympathetic and after carrying out some tests said, “Well you know Jacqueline was starved of oxygen at birth and is brain damaged, which has resulted in Epilepsy." He started her on a course of anticonvulsant drugs and told me to come back in three months.  I was absolutely astounded, as although we had both had a bad time during her birth, not one person had mentioned her being starved of oxygen. The consultant assumed I knew all about it, but things were so very different in those days, and the patient was seldom told the complete story.  Now it was up to me to drive home from Reading and break the news to Bob...

To be continued 

Guest Post – My Sister Remembers – Part Eight

Bob and I began our married life at Number 5, Blanket Street, East Worldham, near Alton in Hampshire.  A beautiful old thatched house, which we rented from Gales Brewery, very picturesque, but with no running water and a lavi down the back garden. The front garden was surrounded by a stone wall with a little wooden gate in the middle. Going through the front door you entered a nice sized lounge with a huge inglenook fireplace and a large understairs cupboard where we found a lovely copper warming pan. Off the lounge was a small dining room. The stairs went up from the lounge to one large bedroom and one small one directly off that. All the walls and ceilings had large black beams, which I loved. I spent many happy hours making curtains for the pretty windows and making the house look as cosy as I could. At the back of the house was the scullery, which was just a room with a flagstone floor and a gas cooker. Someone gave us a kitchen cabinet with a drop-down front which we used as a work surface, it was also handy for storing food and china. It was at about this time Bob had a win on the football pools. I'm not sure of the actual amount he won, but I think it was about £180, which was a lot of money in 1961. We went to The Ideal Home Exhibition in London and bought new lino for the lounge, dining room and bedroom, a bedroom suite, a spin dryer and a radio – what luxury.   

Left to right; Marian, Pat Wood holding Simon and Hartie Wood.

There was an elderly gentleman living next door, a real character with a house full of treasures.  He gave us some small trinkets to help our home look lived in. He also gave me a carpet beater which I would use to give the rugs a good old smacking, a wonderful thing to do when I ran out of humour. The Blacksmith shop/forge was on the right of our house and Bob’s mum and dad lived in the house next to that. Behind their house was a yard with a washhouse in a block. It might sound romantic, but you should try doing your washing in the winter. The outside tap always froze up and I remember once boiling the last of the bucket of water to try to thaw it out. Bob didn't worry too much about it preferring to leave me to get on with it.  It's great when you are young and in love but I certainly wouldn't be happy doing it now!

The outside of the house has changed little over the years other than half the front garden has been taken for parking and the thatch that was old and black has been replaced. It is now a modern detached house with running water and bathrooms, how I wish I could afford to buy it, but at least I can say, “I lived there”.

The house as it looks now.

I adopted lots of cats at Blanket Street. They came from the farm but much preferred living with us. When the farmer found out where they were he wanted them back so Bob bought me a lovely little black-and-white kitten which we called Ally Cat.  I loved him to bits, but he was only a few months old when he got run over by a car, and I decided I wouldn't have any more cats.

Ally Cat at the front of the house

Not long after that we rescued a dog. He was living in a coal bunker at the back of the Three Horse Shoes Pub, and the landlord really didn't  want him. The poor thing barked and whined day and night and in the end we asked the landlord if we could have him, but he insisted we pay for him.  We scraped the money together and took this poor one-year-old bedraggled pedigree Golden Labrador, called Worldham Honey home. We renamed him Shandy after his early days in the pub. He lived with us for many years and died when we were living at Northbrook Farm, but he never recovered from his first year living in the dark. The first time I went out and left him at Blanket Street he chewed up all the cushions and ruined Bob’s model aircraft. He also stole food, even though we fed him well twice a day.  He once stole an egg and bacon pie I had just taken out of the oven, I put it on the pull-down flap of the cabinet, it must have been very hot when he dragged it down and ate it. If we let him off the lead he would run away and often be gone overnight. It was at about this time he went back to howling at night, and that was awful. We took him on the train to a dog show in Farnham, and he was as good as gold but one of the judges said his legs were too long to be a good show dog and if we wanted to stop him howling we should let him become a breed dog. Off he went a week or so later to spend the night with a lady dog, he came home the next day and was worse than ever, and it was something like five years later before he stopped howling at night. I am not sure how he lived so long!!

Thinking back I suppose I should have looked for work during those early months of our marriage, but I found it really hard just running the home.  Anyway, by June of the following year Jacqueline Denise was born. Jackie, as she became known when older, was named after her two Grandfathers – Jack and Denis. We knew a few months before she was due that she would be a breech baby. I went into Alton General Hospital where they tried to turn her, but it didn't work, and I was taken to Winchester Hospital by ambulance. It was hard for me as although the staff phoned Bob he was not able to leave work to be with me. Things were a lot different in those days and women just had to get on with it – no such thing as maternity leave for men back then. 

I was in hospital for three weeks before Jackie was born. It was a forceps delivery and I was not allowed to hold her for a few days and was quite unwell myself. When we took her home ten days later we were told she should be left in her cot as much as possible as she had had a difficult time. Mum and dad picked us up from Winchester hospital and Jackie was in her carrycot. Mum wanted to carry her indoors, but Bob said she should be left in her carrycot and at that mum got very annoyed and she and dad went home.  I didn't hear anything from them for weeks, and it was very hurtful. We didn't have a phone and mobiles were unheard of in those days so we didn't sort it out properly for ages. It was very difficult looking after Jackie in the old house, she was not an easy baby, and would not suck from a bottle and I didn't want to breast feed. She would cry and cry all night and I thought I would go mad. I also thought I was a really bad mum as she so got on my nerves and I had no help from anyone. Eventually, the local nurse suggested I put a needle through the teat of her bottle so that I could just pour the milk gently into her mouth and it did make life much better. 

Tony and Eva Flitney (Eva holding Jackie), Denis and Rene Flitney and Barbara at the front.

Jacqueline was baptised at St. Mary’s Church, East Worldham. Pam and Norman’s son, Andrew was born in August and so we had a double christening. It was another really lovely sunny day, and although we couldn't afford many new clothes, Bob bought me a blue and white check suit, which looked very smart for the occasion. I found a beautiful christening gown in an antique shop which fitted Jackie perfectly. 

St. Mary’s Church, East Worldham

Sue, Bob and Jackie

We realised it would be difficult to get through another winter at Blanket Street, and as we were unable to get a Council House Bob decided to look for a job with a cottage. He got a job on a hop farm at Wyck, which is a few miles from Alton and close to Binstead. We moved into a semi-detached house with an indoor toilet, bathroom, a lovely garden and gorgeous views over the Hanger, which spreads all the way to Selborne.  Summer time at Wyck was idyllic and Pat Wood, and Pam Kirk would often walk over with Simon and Andrew and the babies would crawl about in the garden. Mum Wood was a very good mum-in-law she always arrived with food parcels and sometimes the corned beef or bread and jam she gave us was the only food we had for the last few days of the week. She also spent a lot of time knitting clothes for the babies and Jackie always wore what she knitted. Money was so short then that a social life was out of the question, but long walks with Shandy always made me feel better. It must have been hard for Bob but he always seemed content with his life.

My 21st birthday was spent at Wyck. I didn't have a party but Pat and Mike came for a visit and gave me a gift of a round dressing table stool with a furry cover. I really loved it, and it was in constant use for more than thirty years. Mum and dad gave me a dressing table set which has only just fallen apart and mum and dad Wood gave me a pretty powder compact. Bob bought me my best present ever – a sewing machine, which was passed on to Paula when it was about thirty years old.

One really sad thing happened while we were living there. Jack Wood (Bob’s father) died; it was a difficult time for Hartie and all the family. He was unwell for a long time, and it’s thought some of the problems with his lungs originated from the First World War.  He was a Blacksmith all his working life and even shod horses during the war.  He was a very well respected person in East Worldham, and some of his work remains in the church to this day.

Some of the item's in East Worldham Church made by Jack Wood

To be continued...