My mum Rene (Alice Irene Flitney née Harding) died in 1999. When my brother, sister and I went through her things we found an envelope full of old newspaper clippings and other bits and pieces. We looked through the papers and put the envelope away, but those yellowing pieces of paper keep whispering of half-forgotten times and places. Places like Butlers Cross, Stoke Mandeville, Aylesbury, West Wycombe, Little Kimble, Wendover, Ellesborough, Southcourt and Princes Risborough.

Showing posts with label Flitney family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Flitney family. Show all posts

Sunday, 4 September 2016

A postcard and a visit to Well Manor Farm

Buckingham old postcard

You might wonder why I'm sharing this rather ordinary looking postcard.  The views of Buckingham (The Square and Town Hall, the old jail, the church of St. Peter and St. Paul, an old house, the River Ouse) are perfectly nice but not especially interesting. It’s neither very old nor rare, but it is special in that it opens a very small window into the past.


The postcard sent in 1960 is addressed to my parents Mr & Mrs D. Flitney (Rene and Denis), Well Manor Farm, Hampshire (UK).  I’ve not been back to Well for many years but the last time I visited it looked very much as it always has. It is one of those timeless places, and it is somewhere that will be forever dear to my heart.

Auntie Jean sent the card after she and her husband Graham, and their two boys spent a day or two at Well. I was twelve at the time but to be perfectly honest I have no recollection of the visit. The card, however, did bring back memories. This is what Aunty Jean wrote; 

We arrived back soon after 9 last evening, the mileage done was 67, so I think we travelled on the route you gave us OK.

We may have not needed to go through Henley, but the scenery was gorgeous and well worth the extra 2 or 3 miles.

We stopped for a drink at Twyford in the square and then came straight on. 

The stay was enjoyed all round and we know the boys loved it. Colin stayed awake after the first half hour, but was soon down to it when put to bed. I think he was determined not to miss anything on the route. 

Seeing those words all these years later reminded me of my dad. He loved to talk mileages and always had an opinion on the best or quickest route to or from anywhere.  I have a clear picture of him fetching his map books from the car and running his finger along the route while adding up the miles in his head. 

Naturally, I have no memories of Jean and Graham stopping in the square at Twyford, but it did bring back memories of days out with mum and dad.  

Most journeys started out with a stop at a transport café. Few families used them, but dad loved them.  A good strong cup of tea and a fry up would set him up for the rest of the journey.  The prices were usually low, the staff friendly and lorry drivers were always happy to chat. In my memory, every single conversation was the same – the best route, the number of miles and more importantly any traffic problems. This was in the days before mobile phones and the Internet so the only way to find out about these things was by word of mouth.

After a day spent with relatives or at the sea, we would set off for home and sooner or later dad would mention needing to ‘stretch his legs’. This was the signal for mum and I to start looking out for a decent pub. Those that appeared grubby or had shoddy paintwork would be rejected out of hand.  Those with five or six cars in the car park were deemed too busy. Eventually, we would find something that looked ‘nice’ and dad would pull in.   If it was a warm evening, we would sit in the garden, but more often than not they went inside while I waited in the car. After a few minutes, one of them would return with a bag of crisps and a fizzy drink. This was long before the drink driving ban, and they would often be an hour or more. Once fed and watered, we would be underway again.

The only part of the day I didn’t enjoy was the ‘eating up’ of the sandwiches. These were the leftovers from lunch, by now soggy and truly horrible. Dad would munch his way through a couple, but it was more than I could stand so I would say goodnight and take myself off to bed.  NB My brother married when I was quite young as did my sister. These recollections are of the time after they left home, prior to that all three of us would be in the car.

I don't have any photographs of Jean and Graham, but this is one of me as I must have looked when they visited. A note on the back reads Bobbie and Blacky. I don't think Blacky was our cat, so I'm guessing he belonged to the family who owned The Chequers Inn. 

Barbara Flitney at Well, Long Sutton, Hampshire

The Chequers Inn is to my right (out of the picture). The building behind me is Mulberry Cottage once the home of Old Bell Ridges. I don't know Bell's actual name, although I assume it must have been Bella or Annabelle. I have two clear memories of her. The first is that most of the children in the village (including me) were a little afraid of her because on nights when the moon was full she would stand in her garden and scream. The second is of her showing mum a collection of beautiful old-fashioned Valentine’s cards the type made from material and lace. Other than that Old Bell Ridges was and will probably remain a mystery to me. I do wonder how she would feel if she knew the house she once lived in now has a price tag of more than one million pounds.  

August, 2016. For my birthday this year Terry offered to take me to London, Bath, Bristol or anywhere else of my choosing - I chose to go back to Well.

The Chequers Inn, Well, Hook, Hants
The Chequers Inn, Well, Hampshire in August 2016.
The Chequers Inn, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hook, Hants
The Chequers 

Well Manor Farm Cottages, Flitney Family, Well,  Hampshire
Well Manor Cottages a pair of semi-detached cottages and the place I grew up. We lived in the one on the right of the photograph. Mum and dad were incredibly proud of the garden and spent hours working on it.  (With thanks to my sister Sue for the photo)

Well Manor Farm Cottages, Dutch Barn, Cowshed, 1960s, Flitney Family, Hook, Hampshire
Looking in the opposite direction with the dutch barn and cowshed in the distance.

The same pair of cottages in 2011 this was some time after our parents died. 

Well Manor Farm Cottages, gone but not forgotten, Nr Long Sutton Hampshire
Aug 2016 - can you spot the difference?

The house where we lived has been completely flattened, the other half of the pair still stands but our home has gone. The only thing left is a gate and a mark in the grass where the path used to be.

Well Manor Farm Cottages, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire


Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr. Long Sutton, Hampshire
This photograph taken across the fields at the back of the farm might give you a clearer idea. Our house should be directly in line with the dead tree.  Most of the original farm buildings have also been knocked down and replaced.

 These buildings now stand where the dutch barn once stood. Progress? I guess so but I know which I prefer, although having said that most of the farm had fallen into disrepair in the intervening years. 

The back of the new barn.

Another of the new farm buildings

Much of the rest of the village looks almost exactly as it did...

Well, Lower Froyle, Crondall, Nr Basingstoke, Hampshire


Near The Chequers at Well, Hampshire
The cricket pitch used to be in the field beyond this fence, I have no idea why I felt it necessary to point that out!  I’m standing in front of one of my favourite trees and the one I used to climb at every opportunity.  As I've grown older, the tree has grown taller - I'm not sure I could climb it now, although I was tempted to try.

Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire
The field where the cricket pitch used to be. 

The well at Well, Nr Long Sutton Hampshire
The well at Well 

The well at Well, Nr Long Sutton Hampshire

William Fullerton who died at Well Manor, August 25th, 1888. The Well at Well.
This well is a gift to the inhabitants of the hamlet from William Fullerton who died at Well Manor, August 25th, 1888.

Cottage at Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire
A family by the name of Biddlecombe lived here.  I believe Mr & Mrs Biddlecombe had a son and a daughter. The little girl and I used to play together until the awful day when she fell out of a tree and broke her collarbone. I wish I could remember her name – Janet perhaps?  She was a good two years younger than me so the day she fell I naturally got the blame.  I remember knocking on their front door the following day and her mother telling me exactly where to go!  That was the end of our friendship. I was seven at the time and have never forgotten the injustice of it all – although I did demonstrate how to hang upside down from a branch – so in hindsight it was entirely my fault – sorry Janet (if indeed that is your name).

Cottage at Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire
I can't remember the name of the family who lived here, but I do remember singing Christmas Carols outside their front door. My sister was responsible for our little band of singers. She had the best voice, and it was left to her to decide on the carols and who should sing what. She had a passion for singing descant, and it was down to the rest of us to follow along with the basic melody.  Unfortunately, the moment she started singing I would find myself joining in.  I just could not get it right no matter how often and how hard we practised. We must have looked (and sounded) a raggle, taggle bunch when we arrived at this particular door, and I don’t think we were very welcome.

 The following photographs are of the woods and fields at Well Manor Farm.  I’m afraid I was trespassing at this point (Terry had gone to park the car – so he is not implicated in this!) I could not leave without walking these familiar paths and as requests left on the new farm owner’s blog had gone unanswered I decided to risk a telling off. 

Well Manor Farm, Well, Hook, Hampshire

Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire
Taking only pictures, leaving only footprints and a great big chunk of my heart

Well Manor Farm, Well, Hook, Hampshire

Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire

Well Manor Farm, Well, Hook, Hampshire

Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire

Woods at Well Manor Farm, Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire

Well Manor Farm, Well, Hook, Hampshire

Road sign Well, Nr Long Sutton, Hampshire
I started off by saying I’ve not been back to Well for many years and the last time I visited it looked very much as it always has. However, time has indeed wrought changes at Well Manor Farm. Happily, the woods and fields are virtually unchanged.

Stored at the bottom of a box for more than fifty years Auntie Jean's postcard took me on a journey through my memories and reminded me it was time to go home.


Wednesday, 22 April 2015

Memories from an envelope

I was already putting this post together when I noticed this week's Sepia Saturday prompt - Aha thought I – two birds with one stone!  The two birds in question are my sister Sue and I (forgive the pun). There are no babies in the post even though we have five between us, but I hope two weddings will make up for that. The post contains an open letter to my sister; please feel free to read it. I have no secrets from you!




My mum (Rene Flitney) kept an envelope full of newspaper clippings, greetings cards and other bits and pieces. This is the second in a series of posts about items from that envelope. If you wish, you can read the first part here.   

It was no surprise to find a newspaper cutting from our wedding tucked inside the envelope, but we were surprised to find a wedding invitation. Those invites meant a lot to us back in 1970, but we didn't think to put one in our keepsake box. 

Terry and I agonised over the choice of design for weeks. Actually, I don't think Terry could have cared less, but he did his best to pretend he did!  In the end, we settled on a 'stained-glass window' effect. 


I have no idea why we chose the ones with a green background as our wedding was all white and pink! Perhaps colour themed weddings weren't so important then.

A Honeymoon in Austria 

A honeymoon in Austria and Switzerland followed the wedding at Odiham Parish Church of Miss Barbara Ann (Tut! my name is Anne) Flitney, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. D. W. Flitney, of Well Manor Farm, Long Sutton, and Mr. Terence Fisher, son of Mr. and Mrs. F. Fisher, of Blunden close, Basingstoke. The service was conducted by Rev. Philip Tidmarsh. 

Given away by her father, the bride wore a full-length dress of white nylon voile. It was high necked and the neck, bodice and cuffs were trimmed with pink lace. Her shoulder length veil was held in place by a band of white roses and she carried a bouquet of white lilies of the valley and pink rosebuds.

Attendants were the bride's sister Mrs. Susan Wood (Matron of Honour), and bride's nieces Paula Wood and Michelle Flitney. Mrs Wood wore a full length, pink dress with bell sleeves, trimmed with rosebuds. She wore a pink rose in her hair and carried a bouquet of pink and white carnations. Paula and Michelle also wore full length, pink dresses with long sleeves trimmed with white lace. They wore bands of tiny pink rosebuds and carried pink rosebuds and white stephanotis.
~~~

This is probably a good time to offer an apology to my sister!  Sue had no desire to be called a ‘matron of honour’ and even less desire to be dressed head to toe in pink!  She favoured a pretty green dress, thinking it would be better suited to her age and marital status. But I stamped and fumed and insisted on the pink.  Sorry Sue. Mind you, I still think you looked lovely in pink!


Our wedding day the 27th June, 1970. All Saints Parish Church, Odiham.
My sister Sue looking pretty in pink.  Me trying not to look at the camera! Terry on my left, David Jones (best man) on the right and Sue's daughter Paula in front. 


My brother Tony is holding the second little bridesmaid (right of picture third row back). Michelle hated the camera and refused to have her picture taken. 


3rd June, 1961 this time I'm the bridesmaid and my sister is the bride.  
From the left; Mr. & Mrs Wood, Mike Wood, Bob Wood (the groom), Sue, me, mum, dad and Marion in front.

Dear Sue, I was so excited when you asked me to be your bridesmaid. I loved my lilac dress, white gloves, socks and sandals.  I felt like a princess but looking back at the photos I can see I didn't look remotely like one. The little bridesmaid, on the other hand, looked adorable.

Did you know mum made me wear the entire ensemble, including the socks, to the end of year school party? Loud laughter and shouts of “she’s come as a bridesmaid” greeted my arrival. I was thirteen – can you imagine my shame? I spent the entire evening hiding in the loo, while my friends paraded around in mini skirts and white high-heeled boots!

So I guess that makes us even?

This is my contribution to Sepia Saturday 276: The Newlyweds and their baby

See who else is getting wed at  Sepia Saturday



Friday, 19 December 2014

The Flitney Family at home for Christmas

Sepia Saturday 259 : Families, meals, and Christmas.

This is one of my favourite photographs taken at Well Manor Farm Cottages (Well, Long Sutton, Hampshire, United Kingdom) in 1959. Dad (Denis Flitney) is looking directly at the camera which is a shame because the reflection from the flash has almost obscured his ‘celery moustache’. My sister Sue has a big smile on her face as she notices what he is up to, mum and brother Tony are both in on the joke while I'm trying to hide, which is my natural inclination when anyone points a camera in my direction.  My sister’s then boyfriend (soon to be husband) Bob Wood took the photo, he and dad were constantly larking around and a piece of celery above the top lip was always good for a laugh.

L to R Sue, Tony, Rene, Denis and me (Barbara) trying to hide.

It’s hard to miss the highly patterned and very fashionable (at the time) fiberglass curtains. Mum sent away for them after seeing an advert in the Daily Mirror - 100% glass, never need ironing, perfectly washable, no sun rot, fade resistant, fire safe, no stretch and no shrink.  What the advert failed to mention was the importance of putting on industrial-strength gloves before going anywhere near the pesky things! Glass fibres in fingertips hurt.

We all loved Lucy, but we were not so keen on fiberglass fingers.

I'm not sure what’s going on in this picture, but I can imagine Bob saying something like "hold it" and we did. Mum with her cup of tea, me with a Christmas cracker, brother Tony with a plate of bread and butter with a cracker on top, dad pretending to eat a mince pie, and Sue flirting with the photographer! According to the captions in the album, the photographs were all taken on the same day, but I feel sure they must have been different days over the Christmas holiday. Either that or we were in the habit of changing our clothes twice a day! 



In this photo, Bob has come out from behind the camera, and we've been joined by Kosset cat (named after the brand of carpets by the same name). Sue must have been about eighteen when these were taken so that would make me twelve. Those were the days when mum liked to ‘set’ my hair on pipe cleaners. I was supposed to end up looking like Shirley Temple, but nothing could be further from the truth.  The pipe cleaners had a soft fleecy outer layer over flexible wires, which felt fairly comfortable when I went to bed but by the morning were nothing short of torture, which might explain the bags under my eyes.



It’s now time for a short Christmas break. Thanks to everyone who takes the time to read my blog and to my sister Sue and cousin John for all their contributions. 


Best wishes for happiness at Christmas and in the coming year. 

Please visit Sepia Saturday for more holiday greetings.


Thursday, 6 November 2014

Alice Laura Harding née Wesley 1893 - 1939

Most of the stories on this blog have been about the Flitney/Stopps side of the family, but it’s now time to redress the balance a little.

A summer picnic; Left to right me (Barbara), Auntie Gladys, Sue, Rene Flitney née Harding and Thomas Harding.

By the time I got to know my maternal grandfather Thomas Henry Harding his first wife Alice (my grandmother) had died, and he was married to my Auntie Gladys. I just accepted that Gladys was my 'auntie' and that my ‘real’ grandmother was dead. I'm kicking myself for not asking any questions when I had the chance.  I know mum was often sad when she talked about her own mother, but I have no idea how she felt about Gladys. They always seemed to get on OK more than that I don’t know. Gladys is a complete mystery – I have nothing to go on. I will have to start by looking for a marriage certificate but for now I want to think about my Grandmother Alice Laura Harding née Wesley.  

Alice was born in Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire on the 26th December, 1893 the daughter of John (**a gas stoker) and Mary Wesley née Simmonds.

A team of gas stokers hard at work via

**At this time just about every town in the land had a gasworks. Gas lighting was common in most houses, and gas lamps were used to illuminate the streets. Industry too was dependent on gas, to fuel the engines that powered the factories. For most people a reliable gas supply was just a normal part of life, and something they took for granted. Very few knew or cared how coal-gas was made, and fewer wondered what it would be like to be a labourer in a gas-works. William James Thorne (1857 – 1946), British trade unionist, activist and one of the first Labour members of Parliament described it thus “The retort houses are exceedingly hot, for both behind and in front of the stoker are the burning eyes of the furnaces; amidst the roaring of the heat-hungry retorts a breeze as of hell fans me.” via

By 1901, Alice with her mother, father and older brother Thomas were living at 39, New Zealand, Aylesbury. I felt sure the address taken from the 1901 census must be a mistake, but it turns out New Zealand is a hamlet in the parish of Aylesbury. Apparently, the name comes from a breed of cattle that was farmed there. (Wikipedia)  

1901 census showing the family living at No. 39, New Zealand, Aylesbury.

When Alice and Thomas married in 1908, Alice’s family were living at Willow Road, Aylesbury and that was where Alice and Thomas started their married life. I'm assuming money must have been very tight for the family. Thomas was employed as a general labourer and his father in law was still working at the gas works.

My maternal grandmother Alice Laura Harding née Wesley

Alice and Thomas went on to have five children born between 1911 and 1917. Their youngest Alice Irene Florence (known as Rene to her friends and Dinks to her brothers), was born in 1917. By this time the family had moved once more and were living at Prebendal Avenue, Southcourt.

Thomas Harding back row far left. Alice & Rene front row second & third left. I assume the chaps in the back row must be their sons so perhaps the women are wives or girlfriends. 
With thanks to Sue Poulter for the photograph.

Money continued to be an issue for Alice and Thomas as recalled by Rene in this hand-written note from November 1994.

I often sit alone and think of my childhood. We were so poor and I always longed for Saturdays when my Uncle Peter came to visit – he was always worse for drink and would get to us after the pubs closed. My mother always cooked him a lunch. Her name was Alice and Uncle Peter would arrive, sit down by the fire and start crying saying, “don’t be cross with me Ally"  he would say it over and over it always worried me, so he would give me a penny and tell me to buy something nice. I would rush up town and buy a balloon and play with it until it popped, then I had to wait for the next Saturday.


Alice - (on right of  photograph)


Alice was in poor health throughout most of her life and when her daughter Rene got married in 1938, she was too ill to attend the wedding.  

Just seven months later the newspapers were reporting her death;

Mrs. A. L. Harding; After a long illness patiently borne, Mrs. Alice Laura Harding, of 37 Prebendal Avenue, Southcourt, Aylesbury, died last Wednesday week (25th January 1939). Mrs. Harding, who was 46 years of age, was the wife of Mr.T.H. Harding. She was a native of Aylesbury, the daughter of the late Mr. and Mrs. John Wesley, formerly of Maldon Terrace. She had been in ill health for some time, and had twice been in the Royal Bucks Hospital, but her cheery disposition had never failed her. Four sons, well known in local football circles, and a daughter are left with Mr. Harding to mourn their loss. 


Alice was just 46 years old when she died. 


her husband (my maternal grandfather) Thomas Henry Harding

and their daughter Rene (my mother) looking remarkably like her own mother
Alice Irene (Rene) Flitney née Harding with Peggy.

This poem was found in Rene's diary. I assume she must have copied it from somewhere;

Memories are the pictures that an artist cannot paint. 
They’re secret, and they’re private. Some are sharp, and some are faint.
Memories that bring laughter, some that will bring tears,
Happenings of yesterday, or of those bygone years.
Memories of my childhood, of the games I used to play.
Memories of the good old days, that seem so far away.
I sit and reminisce, in the silence of my room,
Painting pictures of my memories and a love that died too soon.


Please write down your memories and pass them on to your children. They may not want to read them today, but one day they will.  

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